


A Long Month

by NeonDomino



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Making Up, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-02
Updated: 2020-10-02
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:07:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26781871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeonDomino/pseuds/NeonDomino
Summary: Sirius wasn't as accepting of Remus' condition at first, but looking at his friend in the hospital bed, all Sirius wanted to do was comfort him and make sure he was okay.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 1
Kudos: 66





	A Long Month

**Author's Note:**

> **Written in 2014**
> 
> **I've been thinking about this for a few days now. I always write the Marauders accepting Remus straight away, but I considered the idea that Sirius' parents views were still embedded in his head and it took him longer to accept it.**  
> 

* * *

Remus looked smaller than usual lying there.

Or perhaps the bed was freakishly big, creating that illusion.

Sirius was determined that it was Remus that was smaller. He was paler than usual, and he was curled up almost into a ball, his body shaking in his sleep.

It was a horrible sight.

Sirius wanted to reach out to comfort him. He wanted to make sure that Remus wasn't suffering, but Remus was.

It was all Sirius' fault.

Sirius was the one to find out. He was the one to confront Remus. He was the one to turn his back on his friend and ignore him for a month.

A whole month.

From the end of one full moon to the beginning of the next, where Sirius ignored his friend who had done nothing to him. Whose only crime had been suffering in secret. James spent the month looking on in confusion and tried to divide his time between the pair, begging one of them to say why they had fallen out.

Neither of them gave him an answer.

A whole month where Remus barely spoke to anyone. Where Remus stopped smiling. Where Remus refused to meet Sirius' eyes... and the few times he did, his eyes were full of fear.

Fear that Sirius would tell everyone his secret. Fear that he had lost his friend. Fear that he would lose the rest. That he would get taken away from Hogwarts.

Sirius had seen Remus withdrawing, and for that month a part of him wanted to wrap his arms around the small boy... werewolf.

He couldn't over the month. Remus wasn't supposed to be there. He was supposed to... Sirius didn't even know what teenaged Werewolves did with themselves. Something to do with Werewolf packs, Sirius assumed. Although the thought of Remus joining a pack angered him. Remus wouldn't ever fit in with a pack. Remus was too good for those. He would get hurt there.

Remus looked so fragile, lying there, and Sirius hated that he had stayed away from Remus. He hated the thoughts that had crossed his mind over the last month as he debated what to do about the presence of a Werewolf in the school.

He just knew that he couldn't turn Remus over, that was never an option for him... but he struggled to be around him. Things were different now.

But seeing Remus' bed empty for the last few nights - knowing that Remus was recovering from the full-moon, where he had most likely been in agony, made Sirius' chest hurt over his own actions. He found himself sitting at the window, staring at the moon all night, worried for his friend.

He was more concerned about Remus living through the transformation than the fact that it was happening in the first place. He still cared about his friend, that hadn't changed at all, no matter what views his parents had pushed on him.

But Remus was gone for longer than usual. A few days had passed. He had never taken so long to return before, so Sirius done what a good friend would do and snuck out with the cloak to check on the other boy.

Seeing Remus in that bed. Seeing how small he looked made something click in his head - it made everything so much clearer.

Remus was one of them. He was a boy, a student, a teenager. He wasn't roaming around with Werewolf packs. There would have been a time when Remus was normal too - just like the rest of them. He was thirteen now, but how old was he when he became a Werewolf? When one of them bit him? How long had he lived with this?

Sirius mentally scolded himself. Remus was normal. Just because he had a condition, it didn't make him any less normal.

There were so many questions, he wouldn't know where to start.

Sirius slipped to the corner as Madam Pomfrey came in, scanning him over.

"If you don't get better quickly, I'm going to have to contact your mother," she mumbled, more to herself. After another couple of minutes of wand-waving and frowning, she headed back into her office, and Sirius moved back to his position, watching Remus once more.

The group wasn't complete without him, and Sirius missed him so much. Why did he let his parents words cloud his mind when all he had to do was remember how important Remus was.

He heard Remus whimper from the bed, and moved closer, concerned for his friend.

"No, don't hurt me," came the whisper. "Don't... please. Let me go home."

Sirius quickly drew the curtains, hoping that Madam Pomfrey would assume that Remus had done it, and leave him until morning. Without thinking, he climbed in next to Remus. He knew all about nightmares. The cloak was folded and placed under the pillow, and after some thought he held Remus' hand, in what he hoped was a comforting manner. He had never held anyone's hand before, and it felt strange. It felt nice.

The whimpering didn't stop until Sirius cuddled him, and ran his hand through his friend's hair.

"It's okay, Remus, whoever hurt you won't hurt you again. I'll keep you safe," Sirius promised. He wouldn't leave Remus again.

Remus was his friend, and friendship was important. Remus would never hurt him.

Plus, how many people got to have a Werewolf as a best friend?

* * *

Sirius was the first to wake in the morning, comfortable with his friend's arms around him. He knew about nightmares, and would wake up wishing that there was someone there to comfort him.

So he hoped Remus liked it.

When Remus' amber eyes opened and met his, Sirius smiled.

"It's about time," Sirius said. "I was getting worried about you."

"You were?" Remus' tone was hopeful, and Sirius nodded.

"It's not been the same this month," Sirius said. "I missed you. James isn't half as kind as you, and kind people have a way of working their way inside me and rooting there, so I think you're kinda stuck with me."

"I would hardly call it stuck," Remus whispered. "So, you don't hate me anymore?"

"I never hated you," Sirius quickly replied. "I still cared, I guess my parents lessons run deeper than I thought. I'm... I'm sorry, Remus," Sirius added, the words tasting strange to him. It was rare that he apologised to anyone. But he'd apologise a thousand times to Remus.

"I forgive you," Remus replied, softly, causing Sirius to smile in relief.

"So, can I ask... how old were you?" Sirius asked.

"Five. I just want to be like everyone else. I want to be nor -"

"Who bit you?" Sirius interrupted. He didn't want to hear Remus say normal. He didn't want Remus to think he wasn't normal, and Sirius felt angry at himself. Had he not spent the month thinking the same thing? He had just added to Remus' self-doubt and he wanted to fix that.

But Remus was normal, just with a monthly condition, and Sirius was determined to show him that. Starting today, he'd show Remus how important he was. How he was more than what this curse was.

"Greyback," came a whispered reply, and Remus' face turned away from his.

Sirius' hand pulled Remus' chin up so they were looking at each other again. "Well, I won't let him near you again," he promised. Sirius had heard about Greyback. That monster had attacked Remus when he was so small. It was a wonder that a five year old survived the attack.

Sirius didn't even like to think of a world without Remus Lupin. The world wouldn't be nearly interesting enough without the kind boy in his dorm with the beautiful eyes.

Sirius frowned for a moment at his last thought. Beautiful eyes?

But when Remus moved slightly and let out a pained breath, Sirius' attention was on his friend again. It would be another year before he remembered how he thought Remus' eyes were beautiful.

And a few years before he admitted it to anyone.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> **[So… this is my tumblr...](https://neondomino.tumblr.com) **


End file.
